How To Reduce Anxiety Through Rational Thinking
Anxiety is not always rational. In fact, one of the infuriating things about anxiety for super logical people is knowing that their anxiety “doesn’t make sense”, and judging themselves for not being able to stop feeling anxious. If you can park the self-judgment (unhelpful thinking styles of labelling, personalizing, or “shoulds”), logical thinking can be very effective in reducing anxious thoughts The key is to identify where your thoughts may be distorted, unhelpful, or irrational so you can replace them with more true thoughts.
Don’t Believe Everything You Think: Battling Anxiety
One of the most effective ways to reduce anxiety is to use your mind to catch & replace unhelpful thinking. The thoughts that accompany (and fuel) anxiety are distorted, but have juuust enough truth that they sound compelling. If you’ve ever experienced heightened anxiety, you know how quickly anxious thoughts can spiral. Here’s the trick...don’t believe everything you think.
Anxious thoughts are usually driven by a few unhelpful thinking styles. We all utilize these unhelpful thinking styles or cognitive distortions from time to time. Here are the five most common distorted thoughts that I see fuel anxiety:
My Partner Cheated... What Do I Do?
You just found out your partner cheated. You never thought this could happen to you. To add salt to the wound, your go to confidant is now the source of your wounding. You feel crushed, angry, shocked, numb, and completely unsure of what to do next. Do these 5 things and take it day by day.
You Have the Right to Have Boundaries...really!
Successfully implementing boundaries requires believing you have the right to have them. Maybe you grew up in a family where you learned to ignore your feelings or minimize your needs and the idea that you deserve boundaries seems so foreign, even indulgent. Maybe you think boundaries are awesome for other people, but not for you. Build up your foundation by using the Bill of Rights list. This is a list of 25 personal rights adapted from The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook by Dr. Edmund Bourne.
Why Are Boundaries so Hard For Me?
Many people I work with have a hard time understanding and implementing boundaries. Boundaries are a learned skill. It takes time, commitment, and some emotional risks to realize the world won’t swallow you whole when you say no, set limits, or choose to you take care of yourself. The resistance of implementing boundaries is typically rooted in messages we’ve internalized throughout our life. If you struggle with boundaries, see if you identify with the boundary hurdles below.