How to Stop People Pleasing

People pleasing has its perks. It often means you’re appreciated as the team player at work, considered the friend or family member that is reliable and thoughtful, the one your friends confide in because you’re quick to listen and follow up in meaningful ways. It’s a quality that is rewarded in friendships, families, workplace, and church communities. I get it, I’m a recovering people pleaser myself. The dark side of people pleasing emerges when relationships become more and more one-sided, demanding emotional energy without reciprocity, and unexpressed resentment starts to fester.

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