addiction, communication, conflict, depression, goals, gratitude, kids, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, positive thinking, recovery, shame, therapy, thoughts, women, young adults addiction, communication, conflict, depression, goals, gratitude, kids, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, positive thinking, recovery, shame, therapy, thoughts, women, young adults

Externalizing the Problem

Beginning to externalize the problem is all about separating ourselves from the issue. Externalizing language asks questions of the problem like, in what context does that _____ usually occur? What types of things happen right before _____ takes over? What does _______ tell you to do? For example, rather than saying “I’m depressed,” you may say “Depression really got me today,” or “I really gave into Depression’s tricks last week.”

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addiction, marriage, mental health, partners of sex addicts, recovery, sex addiction, sexual trauma, sexuality, shame, therapy, trauma, women addiction, marriage, mental health, partners of sex addicts, recovery, sex addiction, sexual trauma, sexuality, shame, therapy, trauma, women

Co-Addiction vs. Trauma Informed Treatment for Betrayed Partners

In the early days of sex addiction treatment, clinicians took a copy + paste approach from successful substance abuse treatment protocols and applied it to sex addiction treatment. While some of this was (and remains) helpful for treating addiction, it unfortunately misunderstood and ultimately mistreated the partners in the process. This copy + paste approach left treatment addict-centric while looking to the partner and family for support for treatment rather than understanding the family needs their own support too. It also carried the co-addict or codependent label over to the betrayed partner.

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