anxiety, communication, depression, family, forgiveness, goals, gratitude, meditation, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, parenting, positive thinking, shame, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults anxiety, communication, depression, family, forgiveness, goals, gratitude, meditation, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, parenting, positive thinking, shame, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults

Befriending Our Ugly Parts

The best way to manage those unsightly parts of ourselves is actually to befriend them. Yes, even that one you hate. Hating ourselves for a certain reaction rarely creates change. 

“Parts” language comes from a therapy modality called Internal Family Systems. We can really get into the weeds on this, but the basic theory is that we all have many parts of ourselves that are performing different tasks for our overall good. The parts always intend well for us, even if their actions seem to backfire. Often these parts of ourselves are working to protect us in some way and fear that if they don’t do what they are doing (pleasing others, being critical, being a perfectionist, acting suspicious, etc.) that something bad would happen. 

Read More
anxiety, boundaries, communication, family, goals, marriage, mental health, millennials, partners of sex addicts, recovery, therapy, trauma, women, young adults anxiety, boundaries, communication, family, goals, marriage, mental health, millennials, partners of sex addicts, recovery, therapy, trauma, women, young adults

What to Expect In Therapy in Dublin, CA

Going to therapy is an investment in yourself and an investment of your time & resources. Before you schedule your first appointment, there is often a time of “Should I go to therapy?...nah, I’m okay, I can wait…” before you actually take the first step. By the time you make the call, you’re ready to do the work. Maybe you’re considering jumping back into therapy, or maybe you’ve never been and have no idea what it’s like. Here’s what to expect when working with me as a therapist so you can get the most bang for your buck:

Read More
anxiety, communication, depression, faith, gratitude, meditation, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, positive thinking, recovery, shame, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults anxiety, communication, depression, faith, gratitude, meditation, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, positive thinking, recovery, shame, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults

Growing Healthier Through Self-Talk

Words are powerful. The Bible compares the power of words to a spark that can cause a wildfire (perhaps a metaphor too close to home for us Californians) or a small rudder than can control an entire ship. Whether our words are spoken aloud or only thought, they have a huge impact on our emotions and behavior. Self-talk is the pyscho-babble term for how we speak to ourself (fancy huh?). Whether we speak kindly or harshly to ourselves can have a big impact on how we feel and act.

Read More
boundaries, faith, family, goals, marriage, meditation, mental health, millennials, parenting, positive thinking, recovery, shame, teens, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults boundaries, faith, family, goals, marriage, meditation, mental health, millennials, parenting, positive thinking, recovery, shame, teens, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults

You Have the Right to Have Boundaries...really!

Successfully implementing boundaries requires believing you have the right to have them. Maybe you grew up in a family where you learned to ignore your feelings or minimize your needs and the idea that you deserve boundaries seems so foreign, even indulgent. Maybe you think boundaries are awesome for other people, but not for you. Build up your foundation by using the Bill of Rights list. This is a list of 25 personal rights adapted from The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook by Dr. Edmund Bourne.

Read More
communication, conflict, depression, family, gratitude, marriage, meditation, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, parenting, partners of sex addicts, positive thinking, recovery, shame, teens, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults communication, conflict, depression, family, gratitude, marriage, meditation, mental health, millennials, mindfulness, parenting, partners of sex addicts, positive thinking, recovery, shame, teens, therapy, thoughts, trauma, women, young adults

3 Ways to Battle Shame

If we slow down to pay attention, we see the many small moments our shitty first drafts fight for our attention. It can be as simple and subtle as the moment your spouse looked away from you when you came out in your new sweater for the first time (SFD: He thinks it looks bad on me, I’m not good enough), or the look that stranger gave you walking Lake Merritt (SFD: She heard what I said and is judging me), or the drop of your stomach when a group of coworkers make lunch plans without you (SFD: They don’t like me, I’m a tag-a-long). Once those everyday shame moments are in our awareness, how do we battle it?

Read More